


Nietzsche & New Beginnings

by akimbo628



Category: Avatar (TV), Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: (not between Katara and Zuko), Abusive Relationships, Alternate Universe - College/University, Anxiety, Broken!Katara, Depression, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, F/M, I promise, I will give trigger warnings for each chapter that includes these, Injured!Zuko, No Bending, Pining, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Slow Burn, There will be a happy ending, a tad bit OOC maybe?, little tiny bit of smut, somewhat of a timestamp format, switching POV, the slowest burn to have ever burned
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-05-18
Updated: 2016-05-19
Packaged: 2018-06-09 04:34:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,759
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6890356
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/akimbo628/pseuds/akimbo628
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Zuko’s life changes completely when he has something traumatic happen to him last summer. A restless man shackled by a forever-branding scar and flashbacks, he wonders if living is worth the pain.</p><p>After escaping an emotionally abusive relationship last summer, Katara is lost. She looks for love in all the wrong places in hopes of filling the emptiness in her heart, and eventually comes to the conclusion that perhaps she is better off alone.</p><p>When Katara and Zuko cross each other’s paths in the simplest of ways, a whole new world opens up for the two. Can they fight their internal struggles and find solace in one another? Can they pick up the pieces of what is left of them and find a way to be whole once more?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. August 25th, 2014

Students begin to flurry about the halls of Ba Sing Se University’s academic center as Katara reaches its first floor. She has ten minutes until her next and final class for the day: modern philosophy. Luckily, she just finished a class located on the third floor, so she has plenty of time to get where she needs to be.

It’s the first day of classes for the fall semester, and Katara is slightly underwhelmed by her schedule. Being a mere sophomore, she is still bound by core classes that have absolutely nothing to do with her major. So, for now, this is as good as it’s going to get.

As she pushes through the crowds of students, Katara hears a random boy’s mischievous laugh, and she’s suddenly taken back. It sounds so much like _him_ that Katara needs to do a double take.

It’s impossible that Aang would be here, his school being where the Eastern Air Temple Nomads reside and hers in in the heart of the Earth Kingdom. He would never make that trek for her anyway, even if he lived a mile away.

Katara feels herself shutting down at the simple thought of Aang; she shivers like her heart has turned into ice. She knows what she’s doing to herself, she knows that building up walls and not letting anyone in is only going to hurt her in the end.

But at least she won’t feel the way she did when she was with Aang. She would never let that happen again.

Even if it means being alone.

Katara takes a deep breath and puts on a battle-ready face—which she might have learned from her brother—as she enters the classroom where philosophy is supposed to be held. She figures that if she looks the part of someone to not be reckoned with, people would leave her alone. It’s worked pretty well before.

Katara takes the last available seat in the front row. She sees a few familiar faces; the size of the university makes that a common happenstance. The only student to her left, however, is a stranger. But this doesn’t stop said stranger from staring intently at Katara.

Katara rolls her eyes and decides to look forward, maybe get ahead on taking notes since Dr. Fire—or Iroh, as other students call him from what she’s heard—had already started writing on the chalkboard. To her surprise and annoyance, the stranger beside her still has not stopped gawking. _Haven’t I been through enough this summer? I don’t have time for this nerd._

And this guy really does look like a nerd, with a miniature library of scrolls neatly packed in his knapsack and thick rimmed glasses in tow. If it weren’t for the mussed up sex hair, and well-defined arms, and the large bandage over his eye, Katara probably wouldn’t have spared him more than a glance.

However, giving the guy more than a thought would be a mistake, Katara was certain. So, she doodled away in her notebook like there was no one to talk to. And as far as she was concerned, there really wasn’t. No one was worth letting in anymore, even if it was just for mindless small talk.

Eventually, Romeo breaks out of his one-sided staring contest when Iroh begins to speak, to Katara’s relief. She hopes to focus on the only safe thing left in this world: her studies. 

…

Icebreakers were always the worst part of starting a new semester in Zuko’s opinion. They were always so forced, and it always involved the most random questions! Which is why it was beyond him why his uncle, his own flesh and blood, would think it’s acceptable to go along with the cliché. _Where do you see yourself in five years?_ I don’t even know where I see myself tonight! Oh wait, yes he does. He’ll be sulking in his room until the pain meds for his eye thankfully knock him out cold.

”Who’s next? Ah yes, Katara. Go ahead and tell us a bit about yourself.”

This made Zuko snap right out of his self-pitying reverie. _Katara._ That must be the name of the girl next to him since she looked up when Uncle spoke.

She was truly beautiful, with her flowing Water Tribe dress that matched her sparkling blue eyes and her long brown hair that cascaded down to the small of her back. And yet, she looked like she could kill you with one look. There was just something about her that left in Zuko in awe.

Not that he’d ever admit that of course.

Despite her amazing ability to make him zone out like no other, Zuko managed to listen intently to Katara’s introduction. She did a curt, awkward wave as she said, “Hi, my name is Katara. I’m a sophomore, and I’m a Business major. My hobbies include cooking, swimming, and kayaking. Where do I see myself in five years? Hmm,” Katara paused to think for a moment, as if she was considering whether or not to say what she really wanted to say, then said, “I guess I’m not exactly sure where I’ll be in five years, but whatever it is…I just want to be happy.”

Zuko blinked in surprise. _Huh, well that’s a new answer._ He chewed on his lip as he considered this. _Is that even an option for my future, to be happy?_

Iroh seemed to beam at this answer. “What an intriguing notion and aspiration, Katara! We should actually be covering the subject of happiness and what it entails later this semester, so stay tuned,” he said as he whipped out one of his famous cheeky smiles.

The remainder of the class consists of discussion of class guidelines and required texts for the course. And for the first time in his life, Zuko genuinely hoped that group work would be included in the class. Even though he had no idea how he was going to manage doing it, he had to know Katara. He had to at least try to utter out a syllable.

For the first time ever, Zuko was actually interested in philosophy.

And for the first time in a long time, Zuko had something to hope for.


	2. September 8th, 2014

With a few weeks of the semester under his belt, Zuko finally began to feel like things were finally going back to normal for him. Well, except for all of the staring at a certain bandaged eye whenever he walks across campus.

As someone who was used to being practically invisible wherever he went, Zuko would get pretty annoyed and sometimes just downright angry when people would gawk at his eye or when people he hadn’t even met before would ask in horror, “Oh Tui and La, what happened to your eye?!”

Sometimes he thought that if they knew what was under this bandage, maybe they would run away. At least he’d be left alone.

This was now, of course, almost a daily happenstance, and now the rage-fueled fire in his gut has simmered down into compliant remnants of ember. Just another daily reminder of what was done to him. Just another way to provoke another handful of sleepless nights due to waking up every hour to sweat-stained clothes and vivid—and unwelcome—memories that he just can’t seem to shake.

Suddenly remembering where he is, Zuko breaks himself out of his reverie and looks up at his uncle, whom appears to be having trouble reigning in the rest of the class along with him. Zuko glances over to his right, seeing that Katara is, however, dutifully writing down notes. As always, she seemed to never be phased by her surroundings or the mood of the room.

Uncle Iroh seems to register what Zuko has just picked up on, because he suddenly stopped talking and closed his book with a generous _thump._ He then clears his throat and says with a small yet mischievous grin, “Alright everyone, since we appear to be like dragons during a full moon today, let us break up into small groups and discuss our assigned reading from Nietzsche’s _Thus Spoke Zarathustra._ And in order to avoid the temptation of idle chitchat, I will split you up into groups based on the geography of the classroom. And for the sake of convenience, these will be your groups for the remainder of the semester. So, Katara, Smellerbee, Ty Lee, Toph, and Zuko”—Iroh winked at his broody nephew before jotting something down in his class roster— “you’ll be a group. Okay, now for the next group we’ll have Longshot, Jin…”

Zuko internally groaned at the idea of group work, yet when he remembered who would be not only one of his partners but the partner that sits closest to him, the idea of group work suddenly became much more palatable. Luckily this classroom had the nice individual desk chairs with wheels at the bottom of each leg, so gathering each group into a small circle was easy. Since the first row had to turn around to meet with the rest of their respective groups, Katara’s chair was closely at his left. Zuko could almost feel his cheeks burn crimson just at the thought of sharing eye contact, or even… _talking._

Once everyone had become acclimated with their groups, the class was suddenly buzzing with discussion, laughter, and the turning of pages. Satisfied with this, Iroh grabbed a piece of chalk and started to scrawl down some group discussion questions on the chalkboard.

Zuko’s group began to discuss the reading as well. Some thoughts were helpful, others made it obvious that they had not even bought the book yet. Zuko himself had known quite a bit about Nietzsche already due to his rigorous high school education, so he even had a point or two to share. Eventually it had seemed as if all of the group discussion questions had been answered, and there was a definite lag in group conversation. Toph and Smellerbee started to talk about the upcoming school rugby match, Ty Lee had her phone badly hidden in her book as she texted friends.

Which just left Zuko and Katara…

Zuko shot a quick glance in Katara’s direction. She seemed to be perfectly content with doodling flower after flower in her notebook. Zuko frantically searched through the scattered files of thoughts and useless facts stored up in his mess of a brain.

_C’mon, Zuko, say something, anything…_

“Do you think Commander Zhao was a fan girl over Nietzsche?” _What._

”What?” Katara looked up at Zuko with a furrowed brow as the doodling of another flower came to a halt.

_Well, at least it got her attention._

“Uh…uh. Yea, I mean, looking at how Commander Zhao tried to be the strongest and wipe out the weak, which is, ya know, the whole Overman mentality, I wouldn’t be surprised if he was a huge follower of Nietzsche and his principles,” Zuko stammered out, ending with a huge gulp.

To his surprise, Katara actually appeared to consider this for a moment. “Hm, I guess that’s possible. It would be interesting if that was the case. Definitely something to look up I guess,” Katara said as she smiled politely, then went back to notebook margin doodles.

Zuko took a long, quiet breath of relief as he looked at the clock on the wall. It was 4:44; almost time to go. He had successfully talked to Katara before the end of class without her (outwardly) thinking he was a freak.

As students rearranged their desks and Zuko packed his supplies, he looked up and saw Katara leave. For the first time ever, she gave him a short wave and a small smile as she went out the door.

Zuko’s face turned almost as red as what he was hiding underneath his bandaged eye.


	3. September 13th, 2014

Katara stirred away at her coffee one Saturday morning in the dining hall as her best friend and roommate, Suki, was regaling the table with another one of her stories about her never-boring class with the infamous Professor Bumi. With his arm affectionately wound around Suki, Sokka laughed at all the right times—well, except for the times that he was practically snorting milk out of his nose. That was gross.

Having her brother as her best friend’s girlfriend had its pros and cons. Pro: you got to see Suki practically all the time. Con: you got to see your brother suck on your best friend’s face, which is a sight that Katara could certainly live without seeing…

But overall, she was really happy for them. They seemed to be genuinely happy. Sure, they had their spats and they definitely had their differences, but at the end of the day anyone with eyes could tell that they had something real and solid. They knew that they had each other’s backs no matter what, and that neither one of them was going anywhere anytime soon.

And Katara, admittedly, was kind of jealous of that.

Sure, Katara had her fair share of dates—especially this past summer—but she had never experienced something so dependable and honest. And just when she thought that she had that with _him,_ with _Aang,_ it was ripped away time and time again—

“Hey, Katara?! Earth to Katara!” Katara was so zoned out that she only now realized that Suki was waving her hand in her face as Sokka was poking her arm with a fork.

Katara swat her brother’s utensil away as she sighed into her coffee. “Sorry, guys. I know I’ve been a space case lately.”

Sokka smirked as he said in a sassy tone, “Yea, Katara, we know. Stop being so weird, will ya?”

Suki punched Sokka’s arm quasi-playfully as she said, “Shut up, Sokka. But seriously, Katara, we’re worried about you,” Suki pursed her lips, “You’ve been so distant lately.” Even Sokka now had a touch of concern behind his eyes as well.

Katara hated seeing her friends worry about her like this, but she knew that she had not been acting like herself lately. Just when she thought that she was going to be fine again, something reminds her of Aang. Then she has to forget—no matter what it takes. She just has to. Filling that void that he left for just one moment was far better than embracing the overwhelming heartache. At least in her opinion.

And yet, if anything that even smelled like a foundation for a new relationship, she ran away as quickly as she could. So, letting anyone in was absolutely out of the question. She never wanted anyone to hurt her like that again.

Katara figured that if investing your heart and your time in someone was only going to end in heartbreak anyway, what was the point? Why get hurt again over something temporary? Might as well treat guys like they’re temporary too, it sure hurts less.

_But does it really?_

Katara shook her head in hopes of shaking away the answer to her own thoughts. She then once again attempted to focus on Sokka and Suki’s conversation, which seemed to be something about Sokka’s militaristic soccer coach. Sokka emphasized his words with the dramatic flapping of his arms, loudly complaining, “He’s trying to murder us with his scrimmages I tell ya!”

Katara rolls her eyes at her brother’s…well, Sokka-ness. Suki giggles as she pats his head in hopes of comforting him, “Aw, poor baby. He sounds like a regular Commander Zhao.”

_Commander Zhao._

Katara smiles to herself as she thinks back to that dork in her philosophy class with his awkward attempt at conversation. Awkward, but endearing…

Katara immediately sobered up as that thought bubbled up without her permission. Endearing? Endearing does not mean trustworthy. Thoughts like that needed to be squashed like a rhinofly. Immediately.

Katara then looked up as she realized that the buzz of background conversation had stopped. Sokka and Suki had matching expressions of bewilderment, and they were directed straight towards her. Katara then looked down and realized that her fist was firmly planted on the table. And it hurt a little.

Katara smiled cheekily as she searched her brain for an excuse, “There was a…rhinofly?”

Suki and Sokka then got up from their seats and helped Katara out of hers. Suki then said, “C’mon, Katara. It’s time for you to go back to bed.” Sokka then muttered something under his breath along the lines of “weirdo.”

Katara just sighed and accepted her fate as well as the love of her friends.


End file.
